|
Post by Laura Phoenix - HBIC on Jan 20, 2022 22:17:02 GMT -5
PWS: APEX Presents Riot Tuesday, February 1st, 2022 Toyota Center, Houston, Texas
We are on the road to Demons Run!
Singles Match Dylan Howell vs. Moondust
Roleplays due by Sunday, January 30th, 2022 by 11:59pm Eastern 5000 word maximum 300 word minimum
|
|
|
Post by bobodoll on Jan 30, 2022 23:59:08 GMT -5
A long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away….
Cue The Towering Inferno by John Williams and The Boston Pops Orchestra
Howell Wars
Episode I
Dylan the Menace?
Although certainly nobody ever would have expected this to happen in even their wildest dreams, our greatest superhero in this every other galaxy, the first and only holder of both the Dylan Howell Greatest Wrestler of All-Time Award and Dylan Howell is the Sexiest Man Alive Award is back in a professional wrestling ring. It’s not like the last time he was back either when he tried to be a manager for his friend Konrad Raab. That experiment ended mercifully almost a year ago, but it went so well that Konnie has left his wife and son and turned heel trying to bleed on everyone and everything in sight on a nightly basis. Rumor has it though that Konrad won the SCW Underground Championship, congratulations Konrad! All of that bleeding can’t be for nothing, right?
We are not here to talk about Konrad though are we? No, we are talking about Dylan Howell, that fine son of a bitch who strikes fear in the heart of any and every McDonald’s grill cook and how much things have changed for him since the last time he was in a wrestling ring regularly. The answer of course is that things have changed a lot, to start with Dylan has decided to start wrestling competitively on a full time basis, a decision that should bring excitement to even the most stoic person. However, for the first time in over ten years, Dylan will not be wrestling competitively for Supreme Championship Wrestling. A shocker if there ever was one, but I swear that it is true! Dylan instead has decided to ply his craft as a member of the PWS:Apex roster, hooray for PWS:Apex right?
Well, maybe hooray not the term that any of you will use when all of you find out all of the situations surrounding that led to such decisions. When Dylan was around the last time, he was in a good place mentally and emotionally, which was a hell of a concept for him. He had a steady girlfriend, and no this is not Addy we are talking about, though the SCW Adrenaline Championship Belt was still on his mind from time to time. This was an actual WOMAN, a real, live woman, the former Dr. Samantha Alexis, Dylan’s former Psychiatrist from the Shady Pines Treatment Center in Malibu, California. Former doctor because Sam had to resign from her position at Shady Pines to have an intimate relationship with Dylan, and if you were ever wondering, yes as it turns out that relationship was VERY intimate. Not so intimate that it could be heard about in the Penthouse Forums, but close, just in case any of you were wondering.
Besides the unmentionable details (at least publicly) of their relationship, Sam also became very important to Dylan’s life because she made certain that Dylan took his medications everyday and in the correct dosages. This made Dylan almost sane (and a touch boring if we are being honest) but it would seem that Sam is nowhere to be found, and in her absence Dylan has decided that he is no longer going to take his medication. If we are being honest, this should cause alarm for everyone. Dylan is a previous mental patient that should at least be monitored closely, if not completely apprehended and returned to Shady Pines as he can be a very dangerous person i…”
Voice: "Pardon me sir, but that really is not a very nice thing to say. What gives you the right to be talking about another person like that?"
Narrator: "Wait just a damn minute! I am the narrator for the character development piece, and nobody get to talk to the narrator in a character development piece, so who are YOU?"
Voice: "Well don't you just think of yourself as someone special?"
Narrator: "Haven't thought about it much, but my Mom always told me that I was someone special now that you mention it, and my Mom would never lie to me!
Voice: "Ok, whatever, Mama's boy."
Narrator: "Excuse me, WHO are you calling a Mama's boy?"
Voice: "Who? Your feet don't fit no limb, and you didn't shit through feathers!"
Narrator: "Very funny asshole! I can't believe I am ev...wait a minute, I don't even know who you are still and nobody is supposed to talk to the narrator damn it! I must be losing my damn mind!"
Voice: "You need to have a mind first before you can lose one there, buddy boy."
Narrator: "Who in the hell are you, damn it?! I am going to lose my job probably because I am talking to someone, so the least you can do is tell me who you are?"
Voice: "Really dude? You mean to tell me that you haven't figured out who I am yet?"
Narrator: "NO DAMN IT, WHO THE HELL ARE YOU?!"
Voice: "Alright, alright, chill out dude, it's me, the one, the only, Dylan Elowisuis Howell!"
Narrator: "Holy shit, YOU are Dylan Howel? I am talking to Dylan Howell, the ex-mental patient, who I am supposed to be the narrator for?"
Dylan: "In the cyber flesh, Mr. Morgan Freeman! Pretty cool, eh?"
Narrator: "Yep, I am definitely going to lose my job and clearly I am losing my damn mind too. I am talking to an ex-mental patient who somehow thinks that I am Morgan Freeman which I am obviously not!"
Dylan: "Oh yeah, and why would you say that you are obviously not Morgan Freeman?"
Narrator: "Oh, I don't know, maybe because I am a fat, balding, middle-aged white guy named Charlie."
Dylan: "Fair enough, but this is my character development piece you are doing the narration for, so do you know what that means Charlie?"
Narrator: "No, wait a second, let me guess, I am going to be Mr. Morgan Freeman from now on, right?"
Dylan: "Now we are getting somewhere Mr. Morgan Freeman!" My character development piece is going to have some character!"
Narrator: "Yep, no doubt about it, I am definitely going to be fired."
Dylan: "Nonsense Mr. Morgan Freeman, I will not let you get fired. I mean, you have been doing a great job so far. I really only have two minor complaints."
Narrator: "Oh this ought to be good, what are your two complaints?"
Dylan: "Well since you are so thoughtful and asked…"
Narrator: "I had a choice?"
Dylan: "Not really."
Narrator: "That's what I thought…"
Dylan: "Great, not important to the point, but great nonetheless Mr. Morgan Freeman."
Narrator: “Glad that I could help, but that does bring to mind one important question that I would like to ask you before we go any further if you don’t mind?”
Dylan: “Sure, go ahead Mr. Morgan Freeman, but I am going to need to ask that you make it quick, because you forgot to finish this earlier this afternoon and now we are getting close to deadline time, Capiche?”
Narrator: “Whatever that means. Anyway, since you said I could ask, what is the point that you were trying to make, about your two complaints?”
Dylan: “Oh right, so you were talking about my relationship with Sam, and you said it was intimate, but that really doesn’t paint a picture so allow me…”
Narrator: “Oh shit Dylan, no! You ca…”
Dylan: “Paint a picture for our readers, Mr. Morgan Freeman. Rather than saying intimate, tell them I used to put my winky in Sam’s kitchen sinky all of the time, and two or three times on most Sundays.”
Narrator: “Yep, no problem. I had a good run, 27 years. It’s ok if I get fired, no problem.”
Dylan: “Would you stop being such a whiny pansy ass? I already said that I will not let you get fired. Have you ever known me not to keep my word?”
Narrator: “You really don’t want me to answer that, do you Dylan.”
Dylan: “Yeah, come to think of it, I probably don’t, now that you mention. Anyway, besides the whole painting a picture with my winky in Sam’s kitchen sinky, you said that I can be a very dangerous person. I have to tell you that was really not a very nice or very accurate thing to say.”
Narrator: “Not a very accurate thing to say? Dylan you are an ex-mental patient who has willingly decided to not take his medications that among other things keep you from having delusions and hallucinations. You are a very dangerous person without your medication!”
Dylan: “Nah, I don’t think so Mr. Morgan Freeman. I just think that I am a lot of fun this way.”
“Narrator: “Oh really, and what about your first opponent in PWS:Apex, Moondust? Is he going to think that you are a lot of fun this way?”
Dylan: “Nah, Moondust, I hate it for that tall Texas because it is nothing personal, just business, but I am going to kick his ass. Have to make a statement in my debut match after all.”
Narrator: “Oh yeah, the powers that be in PWS:Apex are going to loooooove you!”
Dylan: “My thoughts exactly. Come on, let's go. We can’t be late for the deadline!”
Narrator: “Yeah, whatever!”
|
|